Through the eyes of a carer for someone with a mental illness

A letter from a face with no name.

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I have been thinking recently about all the people I have met over the last year, maybe two that have helped Chris and in turn I. So much has happened and so many times he has required medical assistance. After the events of the weekend and seeing the same kind nurse in accident and emergency that I have seen many times before, it made me think. To all those people we have met, this letter is for you…

Dear Ambulance Crews, A&E and AMU staff, Ward staff, Porters and those not otherwise stated.

You probably only know me as Christopher’s next of kin, I doubt you even know my name but you will definitely recognise my face, whether it be for good or bad reasons. I never get to find out your name either or sadly I forget if I do. You see, you have treated my partner on a number of occasions, suicide attempts, self harm, stomach bleeds and other health concerns. Maybe you see him as a waste of your time, maybe you rather be doing something else with your day but I cannot express enough to you how thankful I am that you do the job you do.

You might think your time goes unnoticed, you may only remember the times you were spat at or abused but I promise you, it is normally you that I remember the most in my journey with Chris. It is normally those people like you who I couldn’t put a name to, which I never see again or if I do for very short periods of time, that stand out the most.

In times of stress and worry, the smile you have given me, the time you have taken to answer my questions, the judgement you didn’t show Chris when so many others do really makes a difference. I remember the little things you did to help us, yet the nature of your job means you are usually onto the next patient before I have even had chance to thank you. I noticed, I always notice, and I recognise your faces, like I bet you do mine.

I would like to say thank you, for everything that you have done for Chris and while in the kindest possible way I hope we do not meet like that again, I want to assure you that if we did I would be just as grateful as I was the last time.

Kind Regards,

Sarah Bellamy, Chris Carer and Next of Kin, mum of four.


Author: acarerseyes

I am a mum to four gorgeous girls, and a carer to my former partner of eight years, Chris who has a mental illness, BPD. I blog my experiences.. life is tough! We live in Greater Manchester, UK.

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