Through the eyes of a carer for someone with a mental illness

Contingency plans

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When it comes to getting ready for a baby its hard no matter who you are, so much to buy and organise and put into place, but when you are relied upon as a carer and due to have a baby that increases dramatically with things not many people will have to organise or sort out in their lifetime. A lot of things are unpredictable, for example I don’t know when the baby will be born, how I will be physically after or anything like that so I need to plan for every occasion.

One thing that occurred to me the other week while we were sat waiting for Chris’ depot at depot clinic was what would happen if I had the baby on a Tuesday night, how would he still receive his depot. Baring in mind I am hopefully having this baby at home as my other three were all homebirths and that even if I could find someone else to take him up for his depot he really needs to be around to help with getting the girls to school and looking after them etc. So I spoke with his social worker and we have arranged that if I have the baby on certain days a home depot will be arranged.

I also need to speak to my parents and ask them to be on standby in case I need them to come up and give me a hand, just like my labour/birth is unpredictable, so is how stable or not Chris is. If he isn’t so good an extra pair of hands to ensure the girls are still taken to school etc would be of massive help. Also need to get one of his parents to look after the girls if need be for example if I have the baby during the day or I end up in hospital, this is the bit that worries me the most because they arent always reliable. Fingers crossed this baby, just like my last two will come in the evening and the girls sleep through it all again.

As much as I am hoping we don’t need to use some or any of these contingency plans they need to be in place in case. Hopefully it will make things go smoother if anything does pop up along the way. Now that we are only just over 5weeks away from my due date everything needs to start falling into place. This is the thing about caring for someone with very little help, when you have to put yourself first because of health etc it gets very difficult so hopefully we don’t have to use any of my contingency plans and I will be able to resume back to normal pretty quickly.




Author: acarerseyes

I am a mum to four gorgeous girls, and a carer to my former partner of eight years, Chris who has a mental illness, BPD. I blog my experiences.. life is tough! We live in Greater Manchester, UK.

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